It’s Spring Break in Utah. (And conveniently, it’s also Spring weather!) My family will be piling into the big van, hooking up the travel trailer and driving down to the St George Utah. Well, I will be driving down to St George. My lovely wife is recovering from a health issue and won’t be joining us.
We have five kids still at home, aged 16 to 19. (Yeah, weird dates. Not going to explain it.) You would think that travelling with teenagers is easier than travelling with younger kids, say babies or toddlers.
No.
But, it is what it is. With a 15 passenger van, at least I can say, “Go to your room-ish part of the van!”
But, at least I’ll get away from work for a week, right?
Not so much. My job is one of those that follows me. I don’t leave it at work. In fact, last Saturday, I was down in Fillmore, Utah with a group of boy scouts visiting lava tubes and hot pots. About 8:30AM, my phone rang.
Rodney, several of our agents are getting an error when they go into their ICDEC application.
Okay, send me impact counts. Get a ticket open and lets get on a bridge. I’ll inform the client.
It’s what I do. About 90 minutes later the issue was cleared up and the boys were nearly done packing up their gear.
Headed to St George, I’ll be taking my phone and I’ll be on call.
Does it suck? Yeah, sometimes. As a salaried employee, I don’t even get paid “extra” for the time. And there have been times that it’s been super inconvenient to get a call during a family event.
But, I’m not complaining. It’s what they pay me for. I get paid pretty well. And part of the job requirement is being on call. If I hate it, I can go get another job. Jobs are plentiful right now.
There are some benefits to my current set up. We left for the Friday night campout at about 4:00pm. That’s typically before the workday normally ends. I didn’t worry about it too much. I’m salaried and I put in a lot of hours on Friday before the campout. And then on Saturday I put in another hour and a half.
I’ve actually requested the next four days off. But, if I end up getting a call, by Utah state labor laws, that was a work day. If I spend hours on a call, I’m pretty sure it will balance out the next time I get ready for a campout.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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This is baseball. We count everything.
– For Love Of The Game
Baseball is a game of numbers.
Three strikes and you’re out
Three outs to end an inning
Four balls and you take your base
Four bases
Five innings for an official game
Nine innings for a typical game
Nine men to a side
Nine inches circumfrence of a baseball
Twenty five men on a team roster
Thirty teams
Fourty two: only number retired by all of baseball
Sixty feet, six inches distance pitchers mound to home plate
Ninety feet distance between bases
One hundred and eight stiches on a baseball
One hundred and sixty two games in a season
Those numbers are all official dimensions or declarations. Every game abides by the same numbers. They are the basis of the game. Unchanging and (hopefully) unchangable.
There are other numbers, just as important, that do change.
56 Longest hit streak
73 Most home runs in a season
116 Most wins by a team in a year
262 Most hits by a player in a year
511 Most wins by a pitcher
762 Most career home runs by a player
2632 Most games played in a row
4256 Most career hits by a player
These are some of the “unbreakable” records of baseball. They will stand forever. . .until they are next broken.
Baseball’s official opening day was yesterday. The Seattle Mariners and the Oakland A’s played two games already in Tokyo. Seattle won both. That meant for the past week, the Seattle Mariners have,
– Had the best record in baseball
– Had a perfect record
– Led their division by one game
The Mariners aren’t projected to be very good this year. Some fans think the most they can win is 62 games. Meaning a 100 loss season. If the Mariners could manage to win 81 games (Giving them a .500 season) it would be considered a fantastic year.
Baseball is a funny sport. Built so much around numbers and percentages, it’s still a boy’s game played by men. Yesterday, for Opening Day, the Mariners faced the defending champion Boston Red Sox.
Sometimes you win
Sometimes you lose
Sometimes it rains
– Bull Durham
And that’s why, today, after one day of the official season, and a week of holding on to the best record in baseball, the Mariners had to face the start of the rest of their season.
And yet, today they still hold the best record in baseball at 3-0. And they still hold a one game lead in their division.
It didn’t rain, and they didn’t lose. The Mariners surprised the Sox with a 12-4 victory in front of the hometown crowd.
Welcome to the 2019 Baseball season.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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Posts to this blog have to be approved. It’s not so that I can censor anyone. Any social media writer will tell you that the very best publicity for a social media account are comments. And negative comments are the best. If you can get a controversy going, it draws viewers like specators at a fight. But, it also draws trolls.
TROLL: A person whose sole purpose in life is to seek out people to argue with on the internet over extremely trivial issues. Such arguments can happen on blogs, Facebook and a host of others.
No, I have to approve new comments to keep out the spammers, scammers and internet trolls. It’s flattering in a distressing sort of way, to think that my little scribblings are worth someone trying to target them.
But, it’s not me, they are after: it’s you. I honestly think spammers and virus writers should be eligible for the death penalty. So far, I’ve been lucky. But, occasionally one will slip through.
Sometimes they are clever. The blog is hosted on WordPress at rodneymbliss.wordpress.com. It redirects to staging.rodneymbliss.com. You can create an acount on WordPresss that isn’t tied to any of your other accounts. It could be a made to look like a legitimate name. That’s why I screen them. The scammers and spammers also try to offer personalized messages. “Hey Rodney, it was great reading you inspiring story. It reminds me of a story I wrote here http://badvirussite.com.” I typically ignore them, or mark them as SPAM if they are too dangerous.
Yesterday I wrote a post about trusting my neighbors and them trusting me. (On Trusting People) It generated a lot of interest. People seemed to enjoy it. It also generated some comments. This one appeared on WordPress,
I am always pleased to discover another one of your stories hidden in my day. Wish you could have heard more of big grandpa stories. He like you was a Master at it.
Seems fairly innocuous. It was signed:
Mom
Was it my dear mother, or one of the greatest trolls ever? I considered the fact it might be someone trolling me. But, eventually I became convinced it actually was my dear 74 year old mother. Apparently she had logged into WordPress and created an account with the name “Mom.”
The convincing clue was “big grandpa.” That’s what we called my great-grandfather. He was old when I was young.
Big Grampa with my brothers, cousins and me
I remember him, but sadly I don’t remember any of his stories. He was one of the last of the Blair line. He had one son, who never married, and the rest were daughters, including my grandmother, my mother’s mother.
Big Grampa, his wife and children, including my grandmother
So, I’m convinced it really was my dear mother posting the comment. But, if not, it was the best internet troll ever.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
Follow him on
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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Dad, there’s someone at the door for you.
Are they sales people?
I was tired and it had been a long day. I didn’t want to tell a salesperson no. It’s not that I wanted to tell them yes. I didn’t want to talk to them at all.
But, my lovely wife had retired for the night. It was me. So, I dragged myself upstairs to find two college aged men standing on my doorstep. They were obviously selling something.
I steeled myself and mentally considered how many times I would have to say “no” before they left my doorstep.
Hello sir, we’re just going around the neighborhood and trying to make a little extra money. . .for college.
Not sure if the last part was part of the normal pitch or was thrown on for my benefit. They weren’t dressed in suits and they didn’t have any slick promotional materials. In fact, all they had were two small buckets with handles sticking out.
What are you selling?
Well, we’re going around repainting the house numbers on the curbs.
I thought for a moment. This was actually something that I’d been wanting to have done for some time. It was the most useful thing anyone had ever come to my house selling.
How much are you charging?
Twenty dollars.
Sure.
We’ll let you know when we’re done.
No, I have a better idea. Here’s twenty bucks. When you’re done move on to the next house. If you steal my $20, I’m a worse judge of character than I thought.
And with that I handed them the money and closed the door. Would they steal my money? I suppose it was possible. But, for $20 I was willing to bet on humanity.
I was talking to my neighbor about them. They’d been to his house before they came to mine.
Oh, I talked to them for about 15 minutes on the porch. I just handed them the money and told them to finish on their own. They said many people weren’t willing to give pepople who looked like them a chance. I explained that everyone in this cul-de-sac good people. That you could search the entire country and not find better people than are on this street. Everyone of them.
My friend is a talker. I’m sure he talked their ear off for longer than 15 minutes. But, I also thought about what he had said to the young men. My neighbor had set a pretty high expectation for me and I wasn’t even aware of it. He’d vouched for me without even thinking about it.
In hindsight, I’d do the same for him. He’s one of the best men I know, always willing to help out a neighbor, always willing to be a good neighbor.
He’s good people. I’m not surprised he trusted the young men. I just proud that he trusted me.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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He hadn’t really been doing well for quite a while. In fact, it really should have happened a long time ago. But, you know, hope springs eternal. I was sure I could save him. I’d done it before.
I probably could have, with enough time and money, but ultimately it wasn’t worth it.
IRONMN might actually do some good. He’s going to work for the Kidney Kars. It’s a charity organization that accepts kars (spelled with a “k”,) auctions them off and the proceeds go to charity. IRONMN is helping them now. I doubt he’ll bring much.
In addition to the fact that the engine wouldn’t run, the car is missing a battery. The tow truck driver attempted to start it before loading it on the truck. I laughed. Yeah, deader than a doornail.
IRONMN had an interesting history. He was a gift. Of course, he wasn’t IRONMN back then. He was a gold 1996 Lexus ES300. Oh, and it didn’t run. And it had been sitting out in the weather for a couple of years.
My neighbor gave it to me. I was working in Salt Lake City and it was about a 45 minute commute. I was doing it in the Chevy Suburban. My neighbor figured the Lexus would get better gas milage.
The Lexus needed a lot of work. In fact, my neighbor had a second Lexus ES300, a red one this time, that was in even worse shape. We cobbled the two together. The “new” car had a body that was gold. The doors, gas cap, tailpipe, hood, trunk and left front fender were red.
I tinted the windows. In the heat they turned from a dark black to a gold color. Yep, IRONMN.
We eventually got the car running. And when it came time to get license plates there was only one possible choice,
IRONMAN
It was perfect. It was also taken. So, I had to opt for an alternate spelling. Thus, IRONMN was born.
Eventually, IRONMN developed a cooling problem. I tried everything I could think of. I replaced the water pump, the thermostat, the radiator, hoses. It was still drinking a gallon of antifreeze per day.
So, he went “in the shop.” Or, in my case, up on blocks, in my driveway. And it sat there for two years. I worked on him off and on. I occasionally moved him from the driveway to the street and then back to the other side of the driveway.
I didn’t need IRONMN. I had another car I could use. For awhile it was a Honda Civic, then we sold it to my daughter and I switched to an old Dodge Dakota pickup that we bought from another duaghter. Eventually it had a problem with the drive train. We got an old Yukon Denali to replace it.
All the while IRONMN sat collecting dust. . and raindrops. . .and snow. Until now.
So, I’ll miss getting to commute with IRONMN. I really hope someone buys him at auction and fixes him up. He might be old, but there’s a lot of history there.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
Follow him on
Twitter (@rodneymbliss)
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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I hate reviews.
That’s a tough thing to deal with since the tech industry, in fact many industries universally implement them. I’ve had to write reviews for my team. And of course, I’ve had to write reviews for myself.
Some companies do reviews at the same time each year. My company does reviews on the anniversary of your hiring date. I started working at my company in March, so, that’s my review date.
BTW, in case you’re reading this sometime after it’s published, it’s March now.
So, I have to do my review. (Did I mention I hate them?)
The review has two purposes. One, it is an indication, or a scorecard of how the last year has gone. It’s also the basis for merit increases. It is the basis for how much of a raise I’ll get for the coming year.
So, it’s both a forward and a backward looking document. And it happens once per year. No pressure. Oh, and one final piece of data, you write it yourself.
At least the first draft is done by the employee themself. Then, it goes to my manager, and he makes any changes, we review it and then it goes on to accounting and gets processed.
If you get to write your own check, write a big check
Here’s the thing, if you are writing your own review, and if your review is the basis for how big of a raise you’ll get. . well, there you go.
What would happen if students got to grade their own papers? Assign themselve their semester marks?
Review inflation happens too. It’s awkward because it’s not something that’s often discussed. Managers understand that the employee is going to write as favorable review as they can. They often need to “adjust” the review and the expectations.
I admit that I’ve been guilty of it in the past. Review scores are typically a 1-5 scale. A one means your fired. A two means you are performing below expectations. A three means you are doing an adequate job. A four means you are performing above expectations. And a five means you. . .well, no one gets a five. It wasn’t unusual to have my score be a half or full point above what my manager chose.
That’s negociation, right? You pick a starting point, the other party picks one and you meet somewhere in the middle. It doesn’t always happen that way.
In fact, a few years ago, I started doing my reivews a little differently. For the past three years, I’ve written brutally honest reviews. Two years ago was a pretty good year. I completed a massive project. It went really well. I worked with multiple departments and even other companies.
Was it perfect? Not all. There were about 100 things I could have done better. My meetings could have gone better. My follow ups could have been quicker. My writeups could have been more complete. Naturally, it figured heavily into my review. I pointed out the things that had gone well. I also pointed out the mistakes.
I gave myself a 4.
My manager disagreed. He bumped up my score. He felt I downplayed my contribution to the project and my contibution to the team, the company and the client.
This year wasn’t as good of a year. It wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t spectacular. It was an adequate year. I gave myself an adequate score. My manager reviewed it. He agreed with my self-assessment. He made a few tweaks, but overall he agreed.
Let’s go through it next week. But, there won’t be any surprises.
I still hate reviews. But, it’s easier seeing tham as something other than a negotiating document.
The end
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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Politics is like the weather. . .everyone talks about it, no one can do anything about it
Okay, that’s probably not true. While it is rare, we can occasionally do something about the weather.
I enjoy talking politics. If you’ve never talked with me about it, you probably have the view of what normally passes for political debate either online or on network shows that show “balance:” lots of yelling, no one listening and lots of ad hominem attacks.
ad hominem: an argument or reaction directed against a person rather than the position they are maintaining
But, you’d be wrong. I find that form of “discussion” just as tiring and boring as you do. But, it doesn’t have to be that way. It’s challenging, but you can actually have interesting productive enjoyable political discussions.
I’m going to tell you about three friends of mine that I enjoy talking politics with. One I’ve known since we were both eleven years old. One of them, I met over the internet and we’ve met in person a few times. The third is someone I’ve never met in person.
When someone says they enjoy talking politics, I typically consider that they like to talk to people who agree with them; an echo chamber. Again, that’s not very interesting. And it’s certainly not the type of people I most enjoy talking to.
Conservative
Let’s start by saying that I’m conservative. (That’s hardly a surprise given that I live in Utah.) But, many of my friends in Utah are liberal, so not everyone here is Republican.
My friends actually span the political spectrum. Let’s start with the one that most agrees with me. My friend Steve is also a conservative. He’s probably more conservative than I am. But, if all we did was post “Me too” on each other’s posts our friendship would be pretty boring. It’s anything but boring.
Steve has three important characteristics that make him fun to discuss with:
1. He’s smart
2. He’s well read
3. He’s humble, willing to change his mind
Steve and I often disagree. Just because we are both conservatives, doesn’t mean that we agree on everything. For example, Steve, although a conservative was very much in favor of gay marriage. He based his arguments on the fact that marriage is really a three way social contract between two people and the state. In that context, he saw no reason the two people couldn’t be the same gender.
For me, marriage was about the sanctity of the institution. In my opinion churches should have defined marriage and the government match their definitions, not the other way around. Steve (and later the Supreme Court) disagreed with me.
And that’s the great thing about my friend Steve. He helps me be smarter in my arguments. Steve won’t let me slip by with a logic fallacy. And because he’s researched stuff I haven’t (like the political circle as opposed to the linear line) I can learn from him and trust that I’m getting valid information.
And all my three friends have something in common. They are all willing to admit when they are wrong.
Moderate
I’m not sure I’d call my friend Mark a moderate. But, he’s liberal on some issues, like abortion, and he’s conservative on others, like gun rights. And he’s very libertarian on many other issues, like “leave me alone and let me live my life.”
I’ve known Mark since we were kids. We grew up in the same town. Both our parents were CPAs. We went to the same grade school, middle school and high school. And we were both Eagle Scouts.
After high school we went different ways. Mark grew up liberal and I turned out conservative. But, because we already had a friendship, our political differences didn’t define our relationship.
We disagree on some pretty core issues. Abortion, social programs, some enviromental issues. And there are other issues we agree completely on. To the point we can finish each other’s sentences. We are both strong gun rights advocates.
Can I really hold a political discussion with someone who in one thread will agree with me on the sanctity of the 2nd amendment and in the next thread oppose my position on a woman’s right to choose?
Absolutely. Because we have a relationship based on trust, I can argue vehemently with Mark on one topic without taking it personally. And would I attack Mark’s character? Would I be tempted to to launch ad hominem attacks on my friend Mark?
Of course not. So, I know that if Mark is disagreeing with my position, it’s based on arguments, not personality.
Liberal
I’ve only ever met David online. He and I were part of a debate group on Facebook. David is about as liberal as they come. He might disagree whether Bernie Sanders or Hillary Clinton would make a better president, but he’s sure it should be a democrat.
David and I disagree on everything. He’s pro-choice, I’m pro-life. He’s in favor of gun control, I’m a big supporter of gun rights. I’m for lower taxes, David thinks taxes should be higher, especially on the wealthiest Americans.
Now, you might be saying, “Okay, Rodney, I can see why you enjoy talking to Steve, he agrees with you. And Mark is an old friend who you have a long history and some common political positions with. But, why would you enjoy discussing things with someone who disagrees with every one of your positions?”
Because David, like Mark and Steve has the three qualities I look for:
1. He’s smart
2. He’s well read
3. He’s willing to change his mind
But, although David is a good debater, our relationship couldn’t simply be defined by our differences. David is also a friend. Well, he has become a friend over the past several years. He’s been through some personal tragedies that he chose to share with me. I’ve shared some of the issues that my family has dealt with over the years.
David runs a community theater in Chicago. He’s an award winning playright. We’ve discussed not only politics, which we disagree about, but also theater, kids, cars, Chicago, and many other things. In short, we’ve become friends who occasionally discuss politics.
Political discussions are much more interesting with people you disagree with. The trick is to find those people you can become friends with first.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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Geek Warning: This post talks about baseball. A lot. In fact, that’s about all it talks about
Something exciting happened this morning. The Seattle Mariners defeated the Oakland A’s in the Tokyo Dome to complete a sweep of their two game series. These games, unlike the ones played last week and this week in Arizona count toward the 162 regular season.
Mariners fans don’t have much to hope for this season. The team traded their stars, players like Edwin Diaz, last year’s save leader. And Nelson Cruz and Robinson Cano, men able to change the course of a game with one swing of the bat.
The team has instead loaded up on young talent. Prospects and minor leaguers fill the roster. Seattle, 18 years out of the playoffs will be on the outside looking in at the end of the 2019 season.
With so much young talent, it’s strange to see a man take right field the last two games who has been playing longer than some of his teammates have been alive. At 45 years old, he’s one of the oldest men to ever start a MLB game.
And it’s not like his stats have lit up the spring. He batted just .080.
But, Ichiro wasn’t in right field because of the Spring he had. He wasn’t there because of the 2018 season he had where he batted only .205 in 15 games before becoming a special assistant to the chairman. He also wasn’t there for his work the he put in the last three years in Miami or the three before that for the New York Yankees.
Ichiro was there for the work he did from 2001-2012 in Seattle, and even more for the work he did the nine years before that for the Orix Blue Wave.
Ichiro has simply done things that have never been done on a baseball field before.
– He was the first Japanese position player to successfully transition to MLB
– He got more 200 hits in a season for ten straight years
– He got 262 hits in 2004. Most in the history of baseball, breaking a decades old record
– In 2001 he was both Rookie of the Year and Most Valuable Player
– In 2007 he scored the only inside the park home run in All Star game history
– He had 3089 hits in his 18 years MLB career and 1278 hits in his 9 year in Japan, totaling 4367, the most in professional baseball history
– In 2001 he was part of the team that set the American League record and tied the MLB record 116 wins
And he was amazing to watch. Best described as a slight man, he was 5’11” and 175 lbs. But, he could fly, both on the basepaths and in the outfield.
Had he come up through the MLB minor league system and entered MLB in his early 20s instead of becoming a rookie at the ripe old age of 27, who can say what records he might have set.
After today’s game in Tokyo, he announced that he was retiring from professional baseball. Five years from now, he will join Ken Griffey Jr, Edgar Martinez and announcer Dave Niehaus, in the Baseball Hall of Fame.
It’s fitting that Ichiro will be 50 when that Hall of Fame vote happens five years down the line. He always said he wanted to play until he was that age.
Thanks for the beautiful Wednesday afternoons. Thanks for the times of beating out an infield single. Thanks for the thrilling leaps at the wall. And mostly thanks for playing the game we love at such a high level for so many years.
May retirement be even slightly as fulfilling as your days as a player.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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Do you think it will be an early Spring?
I’m predicting March 21st.
-Groundhog Day
Okay, so today is March 20th. But, it really is the first day of Spring. There’s no argument on that. But, what time did Spring officially begin, 3:30 am or 3:58 pm? (Mountain Time Zone, because. . .Utah.)
There’s a great argument to be made for 3:58 pm. Spring starts at the Spring Equinox which is also known as the Vernal Equinox. That’s the moment at which the sun is directly above the equator.
You can calculate the exact moment when the sun is directly over the equator. Although, when you consider that the sun is many times bigger than the earth, the Spring Equinox is really when the earth is situated such that a line perpendicular to the earth at the equator points at the center of the sun.
But, yeah, it’s easier to just say the sun is directly above the equator.
Anyway, today at 3:58 pm the sun was directly above the equator. So, start of Spring, right?
Maybe.
But, an even more important indicator of Spring happened at 3:30 am this morning. It didn’t happen at the equator though. It happened 2,466 miles north of the equator and 5,498 miles from my home in Pleasant Grove. At 3:30 am this morning in Tokyo, Japan, Spring really started. It wasn’t 3:30 am in Tokyo, of course. It was 6:30 pm.
And Spring started when Kazuhiro Sasaki threw a baseball 60’6″ to catcher Kenji Johjima. And Ricky Henderson was standing in the batter’s box.
It wasn’t the official start of the MLB season. That came a few minutes later when Seattle Mariners starting pitcher Marco Gonzales threw a baseball 60’6″ to catcher Omar Narvaez. Oakland A’s center fielder Ramon Laureano was standing at the plate.
And with that, the 2019 Major League Baseball season was underway. And for stickball fans everywhere, Spring was officially started.
So, you can track the seasons by the movement of the planet and the stars (hey, the sun is a star) or even by some basketball tournament that apparently starts in a few days. But, for me, Spring started when nine men took their places around a square called a diamond and a guy in a black hat yelled:
PLAY BALL!
(Oh, Mariners won 9-7)
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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LinkedIn (www.LinkedIn.com/in/rbliss)
or email him at rbliss at msn dot com(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved
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You’re studying for your driver’s test, right? What does it mean when you have two double yellow lines?
It means you can’t cross them.
Why not?
Because there might be cars coming from the other direction that you can’t see.
I’m nearly done raising kids. My youngest are twin 16 year olds. They haven’t started driving yet, but they want to. Out of my 13 four of them are still in high school, although eight of them are technically still teenagers.
My youngest chafe at the rules. Like many parents we have rules about cell phones and internet, curfews and schoolwork. Many of the rules we have are for our kids’ safety. But, they don’t see it that way. They see it as we are simply restricting them. I even had one child once tell me that we liked controlling them. (If he only knew.)
But, like I said, I’m nearly done. One of my kids has an issue with limits. Like most teenagers, he thinks he has all the answers. He thinks his parents are not all that smart. But, in this he’s not much different than my other children before him.
But, he wants to push those boundries and limits. My job is to keep him from making too many mistakes before his reasoning catches up with his emotions.
The problem with setting boundries is that people keep testing them. “Don’t stay out too late or something bad might happen.” And yet, the kid stays out late and nothing bad happens. So, was the warning wrong? Was the boundry artificial? Of course not.
You tell a kid not to drive too fast or they might get in an accident. And yet, they drive fast and nothing happens. Again, is the warning false? Is the boundry wrong? No.
I was thinking about the double yellow line. Why do we have double yellow lines? They are warnings, boundaries. And yet, there’s nothing about the lines that prevents us from crossing them. And we can cross the line with impunity many times. Possibly even most times. Does that mean the double yellow line is fake? That the boundary is false? Of course not.
All it takes is once. All it takes i one time staying out too late at the wrong kind of party. All it takes is one time of driving too fast and losing control. All it takes is one time of crossing the double yellow line on a blind corner or going over a hill.
And that’s the issue with trying to set limits for kids. It’s not every time they cross a line that the consequences happen. It’s not every time they cross the double yellow line that you get hit.
But, it only takes once.
Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.
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