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The Death Of IRONMN

March 26, 2019

He hadn’t really been doing well for quite a while. In fact, it really should have happened a long time ago. But, you know, hope springs eternal. I was sure I could save him. I’d done it before.

I probably could have, with enough time and money, but ultimately it wasn’t worth it.

IRONMN might actually do some good. He’s going to work for the Kidney Kars. It’s a charity organization that accepts kars (spelled with a “k”,) auctions them off and the proceeds go to charity. IRONMN is helping them now. I doubt he’ll bring much.

In addition to the fact that the engine wouldn’t run, the car is missing a battery. The tow truck driver attempted to start it before loading it on the truck. I laughed. Yeah, deader than a doornail.

IRONMN had an interesting history. He was a gift. Of course, he wasn’t IRONMN back then. He was a gold 1996 Lexus ES300. Oh, and it didn’t run. And it had been sitting out in the weather for a couple of years.

My neighbor gave it to me. I was working in Salt Lake City and it was about a 45 minute commute. I was doing it in the Chevy Suburban. My neighbor figured the Lexus would get better gas milage.

The Lexus needed a lot of work. In fact, my neighbor had a second Lexus ES300, a red one this time, that was in even worse shape. We cobbled the two together. The “new” car had a body that was gold. The doors, gas cap, tailpipe, hood, trunk and left front fender were red.

I tinted the windows. In the heat they turned from a dark black to a gold color. Yep, IRONMN.

We eventually got the car running. And when it came time to get license plates there was only one possible choice,


It was perfect. It was also taken. So, I had to opt for an alternate spelling. Thus, IRONMN was born.

Eventually, IRONMN developed a cooling problem. I tried everything I could think of. I replaced the water pump, the thermostat, the radiator, hoses. It was still drinking a gallon of antifreeze per day.

So, he went “in the shop.” Or, in my case, up on blocks, in my driveway. And it sat there for two years. I worked on him off and on. I occasionally moved him from the driveway to the street and then back to the other side of the driveway.

I didn’t need IRONMN. I had another car I could use. For awhile it was a Honda Civic, then we sold it to my daughter and I switched to an old Dodge Dakota pickup that we bought from another duaghter. Eventually it had a problem with the drive train. We got an old Yukon Denali to replace it.

All the while IRONMN sat collecting dust. . and raindrops. . .and snow. Until now.

So, I’ll miss getting to commute with IRONMN. I really hope someone buys him at auction and fixes him up. He might be old, but there’s a lot of history there.

Rodney M Bliss is an author, columnist and IT Consultant. His blog updates every weekday. He lives in Pleasant Grove, UT with his lovely wife, thirteen children and grandchildren.

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(c) 2019 Rodney M Bliss, all rights reserved

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